SEEDS, SAPLINGS, AND THE CHILDREN WE RAISE

 

I was thinking this morning.... On Friday, June 5, I was a special guest at RA International School (RAIS) to join the early years pupils, ages 3 to 6, in celebrating World Environment Day. After a short indoor session where we talked about going green, we all stepped outside to plant some trees together.

With the children gathered around excitedly, we planted the first tree, the perfume tree (Ylang-Ylang), popularly called Queen of the Night. At the second spot, we planted a Queen Palm. At the third spot, we were about to plant a mast tree when a bright little boy, about four years old, asked, “If trees grow from seeds, why are we planting saplings instead of seeds?”

It was such an innocent but thoughtful question. We explained that the saplings had first started as seeds in a nursery where they were carefully nurtured to improve their chances of survival before being transplanted into the open ground.

As we explained, my thoughts drifted back to my childhood in Warri. In those days, many of us were thrown straight into the fields as seeds and not saplings. There were no nurseries to cushion us. We started trekking to school from very young ages, exposed early to the harsh realities of life. Yet, by God’s grace, many survived and grew strong.

Today’s children are more like nurtured saplings, protected within high walls, surrounded by comforts, cartoons, video games, Capri-Sun, and Choco-Milo. There is nothing wrong with either approach. Some seeds survive the storm. Some saplings flourish because they were first protected.

Perhaps the lesson is that every generation grows differently. Some are planted as seeds and learn to survive storms early. Others are nurtured first as saplings before facing the winds of life. Neither method is completely right or wrong. What matters is that, whether seed or sapling, we grow roots strong enough to stand, branches wide enough to give shade, and hearts humble enough to remember the hands that watered us along the way.

As we planted those trees with the children that morning, I was reminded that growth takes patience, guidance, and grace. Some of us grew through hardship, others through careful nurturing, but ultimately, it is God who gives the increase. 2nd Cor 3:6 says, “Paul planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase".

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

ONE NIGERIAN GATHERING, PLENTY PROVERBS

 

I was thinking this morning.... Two nights ago, I organised a sendforth for a colleague and good friend of 22 years, who also happened to be my boss over the last three years. We gathered at the Lake Deck (Eco-View) of the now-popular Finima Nature Park gazebo for drinks, fish, and other “medemedes.” It was an evening filled with lighthearted jokes and banter.

My mind was fully focused on the event until someone made a comment that sent my thoughts into overdrive. He said, “This place is so nice. I am already feeling at home.”

“Feel at home ke?” was my immediate reaction because, as we say, “Feel at home, feel at home, na im dey make visitor spoil remote o.”

Shortly after, a group of four colleagues arrived. As we exchanged handshakes and shoulder bumps, I noticed one I hadn’t seen in months looked much lighter than before.

“Bros, see as your face smooth and fair,” I told him.

He smiled and replied that it was enjoyment. But as I walked away, my restless mind whispered another proverb: “E dey clear pimple, e dey clear pimple, na so bleaching dey take start o.”

Later, one guest mentioned he was leaving to honour another appointment. I stood up and said, “Let me escort you.”

Immediately, I burst into laughter because my mind instantly responded, “Escort me, escort me, na so slave trade dey take start o.”

Towards the end of the evening, I noticed a few people ordering takeaways. When I asked why, someone replied, “Abeg, make we chop your money today.”

As my face frowned slightly, my mind, determined to keep the comedy alive, dropped yet another line: “Make I chop this guy money, make I chop this guy money, na so ashawo take start o.”

Thankfully, none of those proverbs applied that night. It was simply another reminder that in Nigerian gatherings, no statement survives without a street proverb waiting to escort it home.

Humour, culture, and everyday sayings often reveal the creativity of our people. Sometimes, laughter is not just entertainment — it is how we bond, reflect, and keep life light even in serious times. “Like one who takes away a garment on a cold day, or like vinegar poured on a wound, is one who sings songs to a heavy heart.” — Proverbs 25:20

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

Cricket Mama Don Fail: My Battle With a Bedside Lamp

 

I was thinking this morning.... I checked into one of the big hotels in Lagos this past week. By the bed was a basic bedside lamp, nothing unusual. At bedtime, I wanted to put off the light by trying the switches but none turned it off. I ran my fingers through the lamp holder looking for a switch, but nothing. I walked to the master switch at the entrance of the room. I tried each of them but no luck. I tried every single switch in the room but the bedside lamps didn't go off.

As I was getting frustrated, I forced a smile while recalling the pidgin proverb that says, “Na cricket mama tell im children say, no matter how ground strong reach, dem no go sleep outside.” I was determined to figure this out. I went back to the lamp, stared at it for another minute but still couldn't figure out how to turn it off. Finally, I decided to power down the whole room so I could sleep. Cricket mama don disappoint im pikin. Dem sleep outside.

The next morning, I called room service to send someone up. I told the technician to please show me how to switch off the lamp. He simply pointed to the lamp and said, “Just pull down this rope.” Wow! For the first time, I noticed a tiny thread attached to the lamp. How was it possible that I didn’t see it during the five minutes I spent searching the previous night?

The answer was simple: I wasn’t looking for a thread; I was looking for a switch.

It is like the iconic FEDEX logo. Many people never notice the hidden arrow in the design because they are not looking for it. But once you see it, you can never unsee it. It is also similar to deciding to buy a particular brand of car. Suddenly, you begin to notice that same brand everywhere.

Life is often like that. We sometimes miss opportunities, solutions, lessons, and even people because our minds are fixed on a particular expectation. What we seek shapes what we see. Keep an open mind; solutions do not always come in familiar forms. Frustration often blinds us to simple answers. Perspective can determine perception. Psalms 119:18 says “Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of thy law.”

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

WHAT IF I NEVER WENT TO OKERE THAT DAY

 

I was thinking this morning.... Yesterday, my brother-in-law turned 60, and family and friends gathered physically and virtually to celebrate his diamond jubilee. As the joyful shouts of “Happy Birthday” and “Congratulations” filled the air, my mind drifted back many years.

It was a quiet evening sometime in August of year 2000 when I received news that a mutual friend was having his marriage introduction in the bustling community of Okere, Warri. I left work early that day and attended with my brothers and a group of friends we fondly called “Officers.”

While at the event, my attention was drawn to a young lady moving around warmly attending to guests. Curious, I asked about her and discovered she was the younger sister of our mutual friend. About eighteen months later, that same young lady became my wife. My young wife.

As the birthday celebration continued yesterday, one question kept echoing in my heart: What if I had not attended that introduction ceremony at Okere? Would I still have met my wife? Would my children even exist? Could the course of my life have turned out completely differently?

That single decision to attend an event changed my life forever — thankfully for good. Yet it also reminded me of other moments in life that carried unseen consequences. I remember surviving a terrible accident one Sunday while returning from church. Years later, I still wonder: What if I had stayed back a little longer?

Life is full of moments that seem ordinary at the time but later reveal themselves as destiny-defining encounters. God orchestrates events in ways we often cannot understand. What appears accidental to us may actually be part of a greater design.

Never underestimate the significance of simple decisions. Some opportunities and encounters carry life-changing consequences. God often works quietly through ordinary moments to shape extraordinary destinies. What if I never went to Okere that day, would I be celebrating Kess Moke at 60? “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” — Proverbs 19:21

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

ELDER AKINTUNDE VACANT SEAT

I was thinking this morning.... About five years ago, I started attending a new branch of my church because my former assembly had become too far from home. As I became more involved in service and pre-service prayers, I quickly noticed an elderly couple in their late seventies — Elder Akintunde and his wife, Deaconess Akintunde.

They were always there. Before most worshippers arrived, the couple would already be seated in the middle section of the auditorium — second row, first and second seats to the right. Week after week, service after service, they occupied those same seats with quiet consistency. Over time, they almost blended into the structure of the church itself. To many of us, seeing them there felt as certain as seeing the pulpit or the pews.

Last Sunday, after being away for a few weeks, I arrived early as usual and instinctively looked toward their seats.

Empty.

At first, I assumed they had changed seats for once. I kept expecting them to walk in before the service began. Five minutes passed. Then ten. Still no sign of them. Then the sound system came on and the service started.

In that moment, it suddenly dawned on me that the service was continuing without Elder Akintunde in his usual position. I leaned over to the pastor seated beside me and quietly asked why our beloved Elder was absent.

“Oh, you didn’t hear?” he replied softly. “Elder fell ill suddenly a few weeks ago and has gone to be with the Lord.”

I sat there in shock.

Throughout the service, my eyes kept drifting back to that seat. No, it was no longer vacant. It has been occupied by someone else. The choir sang, prayers were offered, announcements were made, and life continued.

And that is one of life’s humbling truths: no matter how faithful, committed, influential, or dependable we become, one day the service will go on without us. The office will continue. The meetings will hold. The seats we occupied will eventually be filled by someone else.

So live humbly. Show kindness while you can. Love people deeply. Do not let pride deceive you into thinking you will always be here or always be in control. At the end of life, what will matter most is not how important we seemed, but how meaningful our lives were to God and to people. One day, the service will start without every one of us. Don't be another mama Monica.

“So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.” — Psalm 90:12 (KJV)

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

12 Wraps of Eba

 

I was thinking this morning.... I walked into our restaurant for lunch recently and joined the short queue. It usually would take 3 to 5 minutes to get served, but this day it was taking longer. What's going on, I wondered as I looked at my wristwatch. I broke out of the queue and walked forward to see who was holding everyone back. What I saw shocked me. The first person in line, a lady, was virtually being served every single food item on display. I looked at her tray, looked at her, and whispered, “Jesu.” As I quietly walked back to my position on the queue, I remembered my days in Uniben.

It was my second year in the university. I was residing at Hall 2 boys’ hostel at the time, and the bukateria was not too far from the hostel. It was a hot but quiet afternoon when I walked across to have lunch. I ordered my regular two wraps of eba with a mixture of okro and egusi soups. I was yet to settle down to eat when I heard there was a competition in the next bukateria between two students on who could eat the most wraps of eba. I finished my meal and went back to my room. Less than an hour later, I stepped out to see groups of people discussing how the winner had consumed an astonishing 12 wraps of eba. He won the competition but almost lost his life because he had to be rushed to the teaching hospital for his system to be flushed. He was dying from overfeeding.

That experience, along with age, has taught me about the danger of over-indulgence. I remember again the inaugural lecture topic of a professor during my days in Uniben: “They are as sick that surfeit with too much as they that starve with nothing.” Sadly, we have too many sick people at both ends of the spectrum in Nigeria. Too many are starving, while those who have abundance are harming themselves through excess. As we say, rat wey die on top bag of rice no be hunger kill am, na overfeeding or overexcitement.

In all things, balance is key. Life is not sustained by excess but by moderation, wisdom, and gratitude. Whether in food, wealth, or opportunities, knowing when “enough is enough” is a discipline that preserves both health and purpose. May we learn to appreciate provision without abusing it, and to extend compassion to those who lack what we take for granted. “Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags.” Prov 23:20–21

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy New Month!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

FROM BORROWED ROBES TO BORROWED LEGS

 

I was thinking this morning... Yesterday, I attended the wedding of a young woman I’ve known for over 15 years. She worked where I did, serving diligently across all levels, and she is also a devoted member of my church. She has always been known for her calm nature, consistency, and reliability. For years, I wondered why she remained unmarried. So when she finally shared the news of her wedding, I was genuinely happy for her.

Life, however, remains full of mysteries. Many good people struggle to attain simple blessings, while others who seem less deserving appear to get them with ease. Why does it happen that way?

With time, I’ve come to understand something important: some people enter marriage dressed in borrowed robes and surrounded by borrowed glamour, only to exit just as quickly. Like we used to say in Warri, they “borrow leg” and run. For many, getting married is not the challenge; staying married is.

It may be easy to attract a spouse, but do you have the character to sustain the union? There’s a pidgin saying: “Eggroll wey no get egg na puff-puff e be.” Many present themselves as “eggrolls,” but there’s no real substance inside, just appearance. In truth, they are puff-puff.

Today, we see a rising rate of marital breakdowns in Nigeria. It raises serious questions about our values and what we now consider important. While some leave marriages in the name of protecting their mental health, many unions collapse because of pride, stubbornness, and the attitude of “I no go gree.”

At the end of the day, the size of the wedding or the glamour of the celebration means very little. What truly matters is this: does the couple have substance? Is there depth, patience, humility, and love, or is it all just outward show?

Before seeking the beauty of a wedding, build the strength of a marriage. Character, not ceremony, is what sustains love. Let us focus less on appearances and more on becoming partners who are prepared, grounded, and genuine. Then and only then can we say “What God has joined together, let no one separate.” — Mark 10:9

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

RUNNING ON EMPTY

 

I was thinking this morning… Yesterday, I joined my church group for a street crusade to share the good news. We mounted the public address system on the open-back truck, and a generator was loaded to power the equipment. After the usual “testing, testing the microphone,” we set out for what was meant to be a two-hour mobile rally.

Barely twenty minutes in, the loudspeakers went silent. Power gone. On enquiry, we were told the generator had run out of petrol. What?

How does someone assigned to power a two- to three-hour outreach not check fuel levels beforehand? That single oversight turned energy into embarrassment and momentum into silence.

As I was still reflecting on it, I remembered a recent funeral I attended. Midway through the journey, the hearse carrying the coffin ran out of fuel. Everything stopped. Mourners waited in awkward disbelief while the driver hurried off to find petrol.

It almost sounded unreal. An occasion as solemn as paying last respects to a loved one, yet something as basic as fuel was overlooked by the undertaker. Agreement reached, payment made but no preparation for completion. Chai.

That’s when it struck me. This is how many people live. We start strong, full of energy and confidence, but fail to prepare for the journey ahead. We chase goals without planning sustainability, build relationships without nurturing them, and make commitments without discipline.

And along the way, we run out. Out of energy. Out of patience. Out of consistency. Life is not just about starting; it’s about finishing well. The small, unseen preparations often make the biggest difference. What looks like a minor detail can determine whether you succeed or stall halfway.

Before you begin anything, pause and ask yourself: do I have what it takes to sustain this? Because starting well is good, but finishing well is everything. Luke 14:28 says “For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it?”

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

THE PRAYER OF AGUR

 

I was thinking this morning.... Days ago, I was in mourning because a good friend lost the daughter. It was a devastating time for everyone that was close to them. Since I was still coming to terms with the loss of my dad, the passing of this young lady threw me again into deep introspection about life. I was still in this mood when I got an invitation to attend an Easter comedy show. I imagined how anything could make me laugh at this period and decided to turn down the invitation.

Everyone prays to be in merry mood, but it is foolishness to perpetually be in that mood. I have learnt not to pass by any opportunity to mourn with the bereaved because the lessons in the house of mourning can never be found in the house of feasting. No wonder Ecclesiastes 7:2 says "It is better to enter a house of mourning than a house of feasting, since death is the end of every man, and the living should take this to heart."

Similarly, I have always prayed, worked and still working hard to be wealthy. I grew up the hard way and always wanted to live the soft life. My first time on going on a cruise gave me a glimpse of what it means to live the life of the rich and famous. But I have come to realise that while I have enjoyed seasons of abundance, my seasons of lack has taught me greater lessons.

I learnt recently that both poverty and riches are trials. A good man passes both tests. It was Agur's attempt to avoid both trials that made him pray in Proverbs 30:8-9 "Give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the bread that is my portion. Otherwise, I may have too much and deny You, saying, ‘Who is the LORD?’ Or I may become poor and steal, profaning the name of my God."

Most people in life will experience one or both trials, but not everyone is passing the test. Some started poor, became wealthy and became unrecognisable in their insensitivity. They failed. Some faced the trial of poverty and used it as excuse to steal, prostitute or kill. They failed.

I am still contemplating if I should adopt the prayer of Agur, but for now all I can do I put my hand on my head and say "O God, I beggeth thee."

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

SEASONS CHANGE - HOLD ON

 

I was thinking this morning… A few days ago, I decided to check on a few friends in Canada to find out how they were doing. My first call was to one in Ontario. After exchanging pleasantries, I asked what the weather was like, and I was told it was sunny, with temperatures around 17 degrees Celsius.

Minutes later, I called another in a different province and discovered they were still in the thick of winter, with temperatures at minus 13 degrees Celsius. Same country, different experiences.

A few moments after that, I reflected on how both locations entered the winter season around the same time. Yet months later, while one was already in spring and preparing for summer, the other was still enduring the harshness of winter. Life is in seasons. While almost everyone goes through different seasons, how long those seasons last varies from person to person.

However, one thing I have come to realize is this: when I eventually step into my summer, the sun shines so brightly that some people assume I have been basking in it all my life. The rush of favour becomes so evident that they have no idea how long I endured the winter.

It is not how long one stays in winter that determines how bright the sun will shine in summer. Some experience a much brighter sunshine than others. No wonder the pidgin proverb says, “Palmwine nor smell reach faeces, but naim fly dey rush pass.”

Easter reminds us that after winter comes spring and summer. After Good Friday comes Resurrection Sunday. As Psalm 30:5 says: “For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.”

So if you are in your winter right now, don’t give up. Don’t lose your faith. Don’t judge your life by the present season. Winter is not your destination—it is only a phase. Hold on. Your spring is forming. Your summer is certain. And when your morning finally breaks, the same people who saw your struggle will stand in awe of your shine.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Easter!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

BECOMING AN FBI

 

I was thinking this morning… I grew up fully committed to being an FBI — a Full-Blooded Itsekiri. I carried the identity with pride. If you asked me where I was from, I would answer boldly. If anything touched my roots, I would defend it with passion.

But here is the irony… I hardly dressed like an Itsekiri man. I wasn’t fluent in speaking the Itsekiri language. The culture I claimed so strongly, I barely lived out.

Yet in recent months, something has been shifting inside me. I now find myself drawn to wearing the Itsekiri attire — not out of obligation, but out of genuine appreciation. The same outfit I once overlooked now feels like a badge of honour. And it made me pause and ask: Why did it take me this long?

As I reflected, an African proverb came to mind: “Cow wey dey in a hurry to go Europe go come back as corned beef.” In simple terms — when you rush away from your roots chasing what looks more attractive, you may lose your essence in the process.

Identity is deeper than declaration. It’s one thing to claim who you are; it’s another thing to live it. Culture is not just in the mouth — it is in your lifestyle, your expression, your daily choices. Many of us are proud of where we come from, but we have not taken time to experience it.

Today, wearing the Itsekiri attire feels different. It is no longer just clothing — it is connection. It is not just fashion — it is identity expressed. And maybe, just maybe, the journey was necessary… Because sometimes, you have to grow away a little — to truly appreciate where you come from.

Jeremiah 6:16 (NIV) says “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

Na Thief! Na Thief!

 

I was thinking this morning… Last week, I set out for an hour of early-morning brisk walking around my old Warri neighbourhood ahead of a busy day preparing for my dad’s funeral.

I breezed past Okere Road, Robert Road, Okandeji Street, Igbi Street and connected Ometan Street towards Bazunu Road. As I got to the junction between Ometan and Bazunu, I took a left turn into Lower Erejuwa Road and headed towards Upper Erejuwa. Just a few steps in, I saw people running across the road, shouting “Ole! Ole!” as they dashed into a narrow street. A woman taking her son to school, who had been walking away from the direction of the scene suddenly made an about-turn on hearing the shout of “ole,” and they both ran to join the growing crowd of onlookers and beaters.

“Warri!” exclaimed another woman walking beside me. “Instead of mama and pikin to go school, dem dey run go look thief,” she concluded. As I smiled and continued my walk past the scene, where the crowd had already descended on a young man, I remembered a near-miss incident from years ago.

An ijesha/Ijebu lady spotted an old friend at a popular market in Warri after many years apart. In excitement, she began shouting and pointing, “Nateef! Nateef!” calling out to her friend Lateef. But everyone around thought they heard “Na thief! Na thief!” In seconds, the atmosphere changed. People grabbed planks and rods and began running toward poor Lateef. When the woman realised what was happening, she screamed at the top of her voice: “No be thief o! Na Nateef!” Thankfully, the misunderstanding was quickly clarified before the situation escalated.

The story, though humorous in hindsight, is also a sobering reminder of how easily people can become victims of mistaken identity or wrong labelling. Lateef could easily have been beaten to death simply because someone heard Nateef as “Na thief” in a volatile neighbourhood. And that is not just a Warri street reality; it is also a life lesson.

In life, many people carry labels that were placed on them by rumours, assumptions, misunderstandings, or the loud voices of the crowd. But the truth about a person is not always found in the noise of public opinion. The Warri street reminds us that not every shout of “thief” reveals a thief, and not every label tells the truth.

James 1:19 (NIV) "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry." Because sometimes, the difference between “Nateef” and “Na thief” is simply the patience to listen carefully before we react.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

THE GIFT OF MEN

 

I was thinking this morning… Life has a way of reminding you that one of the greatest gifts God gives a person is not money, not position, not even opportunities… but people. Truly, the gift of men.

In the days leading to my dad’s funeral and throughout the ceremonies, I saw this gift displayed in ways that humbled me deeply. Friends travelled from far and near. Some called constantly to check in. Some quietly sent support. Others stood beside me from morning till night making sure every detail went well.

Some people showed up with their strength 💪, some with their time ⏰, some with their prayers 🙏, and some with their resources 💝. But every single one came with love.

What touched me the most was that many of these people did not wait to be asked. They simply showed up. In the middle of grief, they became pillars.

It reminded me that no matter how strong a man thinks he is, God never designed us to walk life alone. At certain moments in life, God sends people to carry you when your own strength is small.

Looking back now, I realise that the funeral ceremony of my father was not just a moment of mourning. It was also a powerful reminder of the wealth of relationships God has blessed me with. And as we say for Warri, when the time reach, na people go stand for you. ❤️

To everyone who stood with me and my family in prayers, presence, encouragement and support, I saw the gift of men through you.

This morning, my heart is simply full of gratitude. 🙏

"Two are better than one… for if they fall, one will lift up his fellow." — Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 ✨

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

MY FATHER'S CARS

 

I was thinking this morning… ☀️ I was in junior secondary school when my dad got his first car. It was a cream Volkswagen Beetle. That was in 1981, six years after Volkswagen started production in Nigeria. Prior to that, he was content with his bicycle. 🚲

He loved his Volkswagen Beetle and cared for it like the other valuables he had. He washed and polished it so often that I began to think he might one day ‘starch’ the car. Years later, he sold the Volkswagen Beetle and bought a Mercedes-Benz 230, this time yellow in colour. He loved his Benz just as much. 🚗✨

My dad’s cars were not simply for mobility; they were also his status signature. I saw how owning the cars made him feel and how they changed his status. Like many of his friends’ children, we joined the class of people who rode to church in our father’s car. ⛪

My grandfather didn’t have a car, but my dad understood the proverb that says a man who drives his father’s car has no authority to sit in a council of men who own bicycles. As a result, he worked hard and made sacrifices so he could own a car and sit with his peers.

As I became an adult and graduated from the university, I never had the privilege of driving my dad’s car. I waited to get a job and make my own sacrifices so I could own my own car. I understood as well that driving my father’s car wouldn’t give me a seat in the council of men who own bicycles.

In 1997, I eventually got my first car, which my cheeky friends later tagged “Kevwe.” According to them, I would always call my mechanic, Kevwe, to be on standby whenever I planned to travel out of town with the vehicle. Can you imagine? 😄

My dad is no longer with us, but I will always remember him and what his cars meant to him. Most importantly, I will never forget the lesson that everything has its time and that one should not borrow to pose. Cutting your coat according to your cloth is one way to put it, but in the context of my dad’s cars, I would say that a man who drives his father’s car has no authority to sit in the council of men who own bicycles. As Ecclesiastes 3:1 reminds us: “To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.”

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

STOP BLAMING FEBRUARY

 

I was thinking this morning… Phew! February finally ended yesterday and we have majestically marched into a new month. But wait o — what has February done to deserve such a bad reputation?

I once quoted the pidgin proverb that says, “na overconfidence make February no complete.” Only a few days ago, while celebrating a friend’s birthday, I even wrote in my prayer, “Despite say your birthday na for February wey no complete, may your pocket be full like December.”

Why all the negative vibes about February being “incomplete”? To make matters worse, my beloved dad chose February to “travel.” That alone could make anyone side-eye the month. But is February truly the villain we make it out to be?

History tells us that when Numa Pompilius, the second King of Rome, restructured the Roman calendar to align with the 12 lunar cycles, the new year had 355 days. Because Romans considered even numbers unlucky, most months were assigned odd numbers — alternating between 29 and 31 days. But to make the math work, one month had to take the “unlucky” even number: 28. February was chosen.

Why February and not March, May, or January? History doesn’t give us a dramatic reason. It was simply selected. No fault. No crime. Just chosen.

And that is where this reflection truly rests. There are many people like February — individuals who, through no fault of theirs, seem to carry the shorter end of the stick. The blame. The stigma. The hardship. The loss.

I once read a painful story of a struggling single mother of seven in Warri who, out of sheer desperation, abandoned one of her sons at Igbudu Market while pretending to fetch money for garri. The boy cried and wondered, “of the seven of us, why me?” There was no special reason. No unique offence. He was simply the one chosen in that desperate moment.

Life sometimes works that way. Some families carry burdens no one sees. Some employees take blame for systemic failures. Some children grow up under labels they never earned. Some months get mocked for being “incomplete.” But being shorter does not mean being lesser.

So to every “February” out there — those who feel unfairly singled out or were chosen without explanation — you are not defective. You are not unlucky. You are simply part of a bigger design you may not yet understand. Let’s stop using February as a bad example. Because sometimes, what we call incomplete is simply unique.

Psalm 139:14 (NIV) says “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Like everything in nature, nothing is a mistake.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy New Month!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

LOOK OUT OF THE WINDOW

I was thinking this morning… I returned from a trip to Abuja late on Friday, completely scorched and dehydrated by the city’s harsh weather. Honestly, the heat is no joke—anyone who works outdoors there deserves serious respect. I got home eagerly looking forward to the comfort of my air-conditioning.

A few minutes after settling in, the power went out. You know how it is—NEPA took light. My inverter kicked in immediately, but the AC wasn’t connected to it. I wasn’t too bothered; power outages in my area rarely last more than an hour unless there’s a major fault.

One hour passed. Then two. Then three… and four.

Eventually, I resigned myself to a long, uncomfortable night. The fan wasn’t delivering the relief I had hoped for. As I lay there, it struck me that something felt off—I wasn’t hearing the familiar hum of generators from neighbouring houses. Curious, I looked out of the window. To my surprise, everywhere else had light. It turned out the problem wasn’t a general power outage at all—I had simply run out of electricity units. All that while, I had assumed everyone else was experiencing the same discomfort I was.

That moment taught me a powerful lesson: not everything happening to you is happening to everyone. Some challenges are personal, not general.

Yes, things can be hard—but that doesn’t automatically mean everyone is struggling in the same way you are. If I hadn’t looked out of the window, I would have continued blaming the wrong cause and stayed stuck in darkness and discomfort.

So, are you dealing with a disappointment, or you are in darkness? Look out of the window. Take steps to restore your light. And if you observe your neighbour is in darkness out of ignorance, help him to see the way to regain his light. Like a candle, you lose nothing by helping to light another candle.

Matthew 5:16 says "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven." Sometimes, clarity begins with simply looking out of the window.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

Killing A Killer

 

I was thinking this morning.... The rate of evil in the world is increasing. Stealing, scamming and ritual killing have assumed a frightening dimension. While some vices are carried out under the influence of illicit drugs, which by the way has become an epidemic, others na with their korokoro eyes.

When a killer kills again and again, do you kill the killer to reduce the number of killers in the world? When you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world remains the same. Pause and think about that statement. Killing a killer will protect his next victim, but it doesn't reduce the number of killers in the world.

When you show love to someone and that person repays you with hate or evil, do you stop loving? As the world celebrated St Valentine's day yesterday, I wondered why evil is increasing rather than love. Be reminded of the words of Matthew 5:44, "But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Let love rule. Kill a killer with true love.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

STRENGTH IS KNOWING WHEN TO WALK AWAY

 

I was thinking this morning… We grew up in the Ogboru area of Warri at the time. Our neighbourhood had its fair share of jaguda and boma boys—ruffians who thrived on intimidation and violence.

As young boys, we mostly minded our business, but there were moments when these boys bullied and oppressed us. On one such occasion, my dad tried to intervene, and to my shock, these uncouth boys dared to insult him.

As a young boy, I expected my dad to respond with force—to smack them and defend his honour. Instead, he calmly pulled us into the house and warned us to stay away from the jagudas and focus on our studies. I felt disappointed then. It seemed to me that he had chosen weakness over strength by not giving violence for violence.

Many years later, after we had all graduated from the university, those same area bullies were mostly dropouts who had made little of their lives. Looking back, it became clear how easy it would have been for my dad to react in anger. But that reaction would likely have drawn more violence toward us—his prized jewels. He understood that it was better to remove us from danger and break the cycle of violence than to protect his pride or ego.

As I began to raise my own children, I often remembered that incident and taught them that not every violent situation in life deserves a violent response. I didn’t fully grasp the depth of that lesson until recently, when I came across a Senegalese proverb that says:

“The day a mosquito lands on your testicles is the day you will know there is a better way of resolving issues without using violence.”

My dad was a man of peace—one who walked away from trouble whenever he could. In the winter seasons of my life, I always remember the many lessons he taught me, keeping me warm till summer comes. I remember my dad again today in a happy way.

As the Scriptures say in Proverbs 10:7: “The memory of the righteous is blessed, but the name of the wicked will rot.”

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

PERSON WEY DEY PURGE (PT 2)

 

I was thinking this morning… Sometime last year, I was craving bole and fish and decided to patronise one of the shops at the Elakahia bole and fish market in Port Harcourt. Being my first time there, I was spoiled for choice, as every shop had a salesperson trying to convince me to patronise them.

After selecting from the bole and fish on display, they placed them on the open-air charcoal grill while I waited. Thereafter, they cut the bole and fish into a large bowl, added palm oil pepper sauce, and sliced utazi leaves to enhance the flavour of the dish.

On getting home at about 4pm, I rolled up my sleeves and, layer by layer, levelled the bowl, washing it down with a chilled bottle of malt drink. I went to bed at about 9pm that night feeling heavy and bloated. By 1am, I was woken up by a grumbling stomach and a strong urge to use the toilet. Between 1am and 3am, I visited the toilet 13 times and almost passed out from dehydration. The purging no get part 2.

I never knew the five metres distance between my bed and the toilet seat was so long until that night. However, I was never tired of walking the distance, because person wey dey purge no dey tire to waka.

Some have suffered love purge, while others have experienced financial purge that made them walk distances they never imagined they could make.

Life has a way of pushing us beyond our comfort zones when pressure comes—whether from sickness, fear, love, finances, or uncertainty. In those moments, we discover strengths we never knew we had. Truly, when urgency shows up, excuses disappear. May we learn to channel that same energy we display during our “purge moments” into pursuing our dreams, solving our problems, and building better lives—before pressure forces our hands.

As the Bible reminds us: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13).

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

PERSON WEY DEY PURGE

 

I was thinking this morning… Sometimes, I really don’t understand how little attention we pay to our choice of words. A guy came to me some time ago asking for financial assistance. I understood his challenge and was willing to support him. When I asked how much he needed, his response deflated my spirit. He said, “Only ten thousand naira.”

Really? Only ten thousand naira? If ten thousand naira was only, why didn’t he have it? I wondered. Could our habit of qualifying a sum of money as “only” have come from the days of writing cheques, where we ended every amount in words with “only”? Na wa o!

As I reflected, I recalled the Nigerian proverb that says, “Person wey dey purge no dey select toilet.”

Ehn! Have you ever travelled on a road trip and had the misfortune of developing a running stomach? God help you. After shouting, “Driver, stop, stop!” you dash out of the vehicle to the nearest—and probably only—available toilet. On getting there, you discover it is dirty, maybe just a hole in the ground that you have never used in your life. Do you walk out and ask for another one? Never! You ignore the dirt and immediately squat to relieve yourself. You know why? Person wey dey purge no dey select toilet.

It was this picture I had in mind when my boss told me about a young lady who had done her NYSC with us some time back. After searching unsuccessfully for a job, she approached my boss for help. “Sir, I really need your help with a job o, even if it is a contract job.”

Like, seriously? “Even if?” Person wey dey purge dey select toilet? At this point, she was purging and should not be selective—or definitely not in any position to give conditions.

Sometimes, life puts you in a position where you have no choice but to accept what is available, not what is desirable. At such times, you have to be mindful of how you present your request, because using words like only and even if gives the impression that you still have options.

The oyibo man says a beggar has no choice, but I would rather say: person wey dey purge no dey select toilet. Proverbs 21:23 admonished us to watch our words.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

LIFE IS A DIFFERENTIATOR

I was thinking this morning… Late last year, I had reason to visit an old classmate, and I rode with another classmate for the trip. As we sat in his SUV catching up, my mind drifted back to our school days.

We were three close friends—hardworking, studious, and intentional. We attended lectures together, studied together, and usually sat in the top quartile of the class. We all had big dreams of excelling and making our mark in our chosen careers. Interestingly, we earned the same first degree and M.Sc., and our drive looked very similar.

But life had different scripts for each of us. Two started strong. One joined a multinational as a management trainee. Another began a promising career in a major bank. The third started more modestly as contract staff in an oil company. Then life began unveiling its package. Decades later, our outcomes are very different.

My friend who went into banking suffered a terrible motor accident a few years into his career. That single event changed his life forever—his career was cut short, his marriage didn’t survive it, and he never fully regained his physical fitness. My second friend rose quickly through the ranks, became a senior manager, but was forced to retire before age 50. He later went into business and is doing fairly well today. The third friend remained a contract staff for 10 years before securing a permanent role—where he still works today.

All three gave their best. All three worked hard. But life was the differentiator. And every time I speak with the friend who received the toughest blows, I do so with deep admiration. Life showed him pepper—and he made pepper soup from it. Despite the setbacks, he embraced resilience, reinvented himself repeatedly, and survived. Today, he has set up a consultancy to help others—drawing from what I can only describe as a rainbow of life experiences. He may not be the most financially buoyant among us, but he is truly living.

As I look into 2026, one lesson stands out: How you start may not be how you end. If you’re starting slow, keep building. If you’re starting strong, stay grounded and maintain momentum. Because what happens to you matters—but how you respond matters even more. Romans 9:16 says: “So then it is not of him who wills, nor of him who runs, but of God who shows mercy.”

Stay hopeful. God’s got our back.

Happy Sunday.

…Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

WHEN LITTLE EFFORTS MATTER

 

I was thinking this morning… I recently flew between two local airports and something small I noticed on the tarmac has stayed with me.

We had boarded, the doors were shut, and the aircraft was pulling away from the gate. Sitting by the window, I watched the ground movement outside. Not far from the gate, I noticed a crushed plastic water bottle lying on the airside—probably flattened by the wheels of a luggage cart. It was insignificant. Honestly, I didn’t think it could cause any harm.

Then I saw something that made me pause. The aircraft marshaller walking ahead of the aircraft noticed the bottle. He stopped, picked it up, slipped it into his pocket, and continued on his way, likely to dispose of it properly later. Keeping the airside clean wasn’t his job. But he clearly understood something deeper—that one person’s neglect, however small, can affect everyone. That moment stayed with me.

I recalled how similar scenarios occur all the time back at the office. Chairs left out in walkways, blocking clear paths in the open office. Sometimes, as I walk past, I push them back under the desks. Other times, I just walk on, and do nothing.

And that’s when it hits me. Leadership isn’t really about titles or what we do when people are watching. It shows up in the small, quiet choices we make—especially when no one is paying attention. A good leader does what’s expected within their role. A great leader goes a step further and serves the team in ways that don’t come with recognition or applause.

As we continue to unveil 2026, I’m reminding myself of this: don’t wait for a position before you act. Don’t wait to be asked before you serve. Just do the right thing, even when it seems small. As the Nigerian proverb says, “Pikin wey go strong go strong… no be until dem name am Samson.” Don’t wait to be called a leader. Be a leader. Strength shows up long before the title does. SOS 2:15 comes to mind.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

SHOWING UP BEFORE YOU FEEL READY

 

I was thinking this morning.... A little over a year ago, I stepped into a new role with expectations that felt both exciting and intimidating. As 2025 began, I wrestled with a familiar tension many leaders know well. If I dove in fully, my shortcomings might be exposed. If I slowed down to learn the ropes, it might look like I wasn’t ready. So I chose a third option—I showed up. Fully. Consistently. Relentlessly.

I brought energy into every room. I attended every meeting. I responded to every email. I leaned into leadership for my team. One colleague summed it up in classic Nigerian parlance: “Oga, your ginger dey ginger our ginger.” And when I found myself in conversations where I knew very little? I stayed present. I listened intently and nodded vigorously, not to pretend I knew it all, but to signal commitment, curiosity, and ownership.

Something interesting happened a few months in. I stopped playing the role and started living it. The work no longer felt foreign. The expectations no longer felt overwhelming. By the close of 2025, the results spoke clearly: targets surpassed, milestones achieved, confidence earned.

As I reflect and look ahead to 2026, one lesson stands out. Just as it is said that in order to fall asleep, you have to first pretend to be asleep, sometimes, growth begins with behaviour before belief. The Gen-Zs will rather say, you fake it till you make it. This isn’t about empty posturing. It’s about disciplined action. Showing up as the person you aspire to be. Doing the work the way it should be done.

Visualization matters. Affirmations help. But progress in 2026 will demand movement. Don’t just speak about who you want to become, prepare for it. Act like it. Work towards it. Build the capacity to receive the opportunity when it comes.

There’s also a cautionary wisdom from home: “E go land, e go land, na im make butterfly take carry person enter bush.” Hope without preparation can be dangerous. Show up. Do the work. Stay grounded. That’s how you grow into the future you’re aiming for. Proverbs 14:23 highlights that hard work leads to profit, while talk alone results in poverty.

Thanks to everyone that made 2025 phenomenal and this is wishing all my beautiful colleagues and friends a Happy and Prosperous New Year.

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey