SEEDS, SAPLINGS, AND THE CHILDREN WE RAISE

 

I was thinking this morning.... On Friday, June 5, I was a special guest at RA International School (RAIS) to join the early years pupils, ages 3 to 6, in celebrating World Environment Day. After a short indoor session where we talked about going green, we all stepped outside to plant some trees together.

With the children gathered around excitedly, we planted the first tree, the perfume tree (Ylang-Ylang), popularly called Queen of the Night. At the second spot, we planted a Queen Palm. At the third spot, we were about to plant a mast tree when a bright little boy, about four years old, asked, “If trees grow from seeds, why are we planting saplings instead of seeds?”

It was such an innocent but thoughtful question. We explained that the saplings had first started as seeds in a nursery where they were carefully nurtured to improve their chances of survival before being transplanted into the open ground.

As we explained, my thoughts drifted back to my childhood in Warri. In those days, many of us were thrown straight into the fields as seeds and not saplings. There were no nurseries to cushion us. We started trekking to school from very young ages, exposed early to the harsh realities of life. Yet, by God’s grace, many survived and grew strong.

Today’s children are more like nurtured saplings, protected within high walls, surrounded by comforts, cartoons, video games, Capri-Sun, and Choco-Milo. There is nothing wrong with either approach. Some seeds survive the storm. Some saplings flourish because they were first protected.

Perhaps the lesson is that every generation grows differently. Some are planted as seeds and learn to survive storms early. Others are nurtured first as saplings before facing the winds of life. Neither method is completely right or wrong. What matters is that, whether seed or sapling, we grow roots strong enough to stand, branches wide enough to give shade, and hearts humble enough to remember the hands that watered us along the way.

As we planted those trees with the children that morning, I was reminded that growth takes patience, guidance, and grace. Some of us grew through hardship, others through careful nurturing, but ultimately, it is God who gives the increase. 2nd Cor 3:6 says, “Paul planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase".

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

ONE NIGERIAN GATHERING, PLENTY PROVERBS

 

I was thinking this morning.... Two nights ago, I organised a sendforth for a colleague and good friend of 22 years, who also happened to be my boss over the last three years. We gathered at the Lake Deck (Eco-View) of the now-popular Finima Nature Park gazebo for drinks, fish, and other “medemedes.” It was an evening filled with lighthearted jokes and banter.

My mind was fully focused on the event until someone made a comment that sent my thoughts into overdrive. He said, “This place is so nice. I am already feeling at home.”

“Feel at home ke?” was my immediate reaction because, as we say, “Feel at home, feel at home, na im dey make visitor spoil remote o.”

Shortly after, a group of four colleagues arrived. As we exchanged handshakes and shoulder bumps, I noticed one I hadn’t seen in months looked much lighter than before.

“Bros, see as your face smooth and fair,” I told him.

He smiled and replied that it was enjoyment. But as I walked away, my restless mind whispered another proverb: “E dey clear pimple, e dey clear pimple, na so bleaching dey take start o.”

Later, one guest mentioned he was leaving to honour another appointment. I stood up and said, “Let me escort you.”

Immediately, I burst into laughter because my mind instantly responded, “Escort me, escort me, na so slave trade dey take start o.”

Towards the end of the evening, I noticed a few people ordering takeaways. When I asked why, someone replied, “Abeg, make we chop your money today.”

As my face frowned slightly, my mind, determined to keep the comedy alive, dropped yet another line: “Make I chop this guy money, make I chop this guy money, na so ashawo take start o.”

Thankfully, none of those proverbs applied that night. It was simply another reminder that in Nigerian gatherings, no statement survives without a street proverb waiting to escort it home.

Humour, culture, and everyday sayings often reveal the creativity of our people. Sometimes, laughter is not just entertainment — it is how we bond, reflect, and keep life light even in serious times. “Like one who takes away a garment on a cold day, or like vinegar poured on a wound, is one who sings songs to a heavy heart.” — Proverbs 25:20

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

Cricket Mama Don Fail: My Battle With a Bedside Lamp

 

I was thinking this morning.... I checked into one of the big hotels in Lagos this past week. By the bed was a basic bedside lamp, nothing unusual. At bedtime, I wanted to put off the light by trying the switches but none turned it off. I ran my fingers through the lamp holder looking for a switch, but nothing. I walked to the master switch at the entrance of the room. I tried each of them but no luck. I tried every single switch in the room but the bedside lamps didn't go off.

As I was getting frustrated, I forced a smile while recalling the pidgin proverb that says, “Na cricket mama tell im children say, no matter how ground strong reach, dem no go sleep outside.” I was determined to figure this out. I went back to the lamp, stared at it for another minute but still couldn't figure out how to turn it off. Finally, I decided to power down the whole room so I could sleep. Cricket mama don disappoint im pikin. Dem sleep outside.

The next morning, I called room service to send someone up. I told the technician to please show me how to switch off the lamp. He simply pointed to the lamp and said, “Just pull down this rope.” Wow! For the first time, I noticed a tiny thread attached to the lamp. How was it possible that I didn’t see it during the five minutes I spent searching the previous night?

The answer was simple: I wasn’t looking for a thread; I was looking for a switch.

It is like the iconic FEDEX logo. Many people never notice the hidden arrow in the design because they are not looking for it. But once you see it, you can never unsee it. It is also similar to deciding to buy a particular brand of car. Suddenly, you begin to notice that same brand everywhere.

Life is often like that. We sometimes miss opportunities, solutions, lessons, and even people because our minds are fixed on a particular expectation. What we seek shapes what we see. Keep an open mind; solutions do not always come in familiar forms. Frustration often blinds us to simple answers. Perspective can determine perception. Psalms 119:18 says “Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of thy law.”

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

WHAT IF I NEVER WENT TO OKERE THAT DAY

 

I was thinking this morning.... Yesterday, my brother-in-law turned 60, and family and friends gathered physically and virtually to celebrate his diamond jubilee. As the joyful shouts of “Happy Birthday” and “Congratulations” filled the air, my mind drifted back many years.

It was a quiet evening sometime in August of year 2000 when I received news that a mutual friend was having his marriage introduction in the bustling community of Okere, Warri. I left work early that day and attended with my brothers and a group of friends we fondly called “Officers.”

While at the event, my attention was drawn to a young lady moving around warmly attending to guests. Curious, I asked about her and discovered she was the younger sister of our mutual friend. About eighteen months later, that same young lady became my wife. My young wife.

As the birthday celebration continued yesterday, one question kept echoing in my heart: What if I had not attended that introduction ceremony at Okere? Would I still have met my wife? Would my children even exist? Could the course of my life have turned out completely differently?

That single decision to attend an event changed my life forever — thankfully for good. Yet it also reminded me of other moments in life that carried unseen consequences. I remember surviving a terrible accident one Sunday while returning from church. Years later, I still wonder: What if I had stayed back a little longer?

Life is full of moments that seem ordinary at the time but later reveal themselves as destiny-defining encounters. God orchestrates events in ways we often cannot understand. What appears accidental to us may actually be part of a greater design.

Never underestimate the significance of simple decisions. Some opportunities and encounters carry life-changing consequences. God often works quietly through ordinary moments to shape extraordinary destinies. What if I never went to Okere that day, would I be celebrating Kess Moke at 60? “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” — Proverbs 19:21

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

ELDER AKINTUNDE VACANT SEAT

I was thinking this morning.... About five years ago, I started attending a new branch of my church because my former assembly had become too far from home. As I became more involved in service and pre-service prayers, I quickly noticed an elderly couple in their late seventies — Elder Akintunde and his wife, Deaconess Akintunde.

They were always there. Before most worshippers arrived, the couple would already be seated in the middle section of the auditorium — second row, first and second seats to the right. Week after week, service after service, they occupied those same seats with quiet consistency. Over time, they almost blended into the structure of the church itself. To many of us, seeing them there felt as certain as seeing the pulpit or the pews.

Last Sunday, after being away for a few weeks, I arrived early as usual and instinctively looked toward their seats.

Empty.

At first, I assumed they had changed seats for once. I kept expecting them to walk in before the service began. Five minutes passed. Then ten. Still no sign of them. Then the sound system came on and the service started.

In that moment, it suddenly dawned on me that the service was continuing without Elder Akintunde in his usual position. I leaned over to the pastor seated beside me and quietly asked why our beloved Elder was absent.

“Oh, you didn’t hear?” he replied softly. “Elder fell ill suddenly a few weeks ago and has gone to be with the Lord.”

I sat there in shock.

Throughout the service, my eyes kept drifting back to that seat. No, it was no longer vacant. It has been occupied by someone else. The choir sang, prayers were offered, announcements were made, and life continued.

And that is one of life’s humbling truths: no matter how faithful, committed, influential, or dependable we become, one day the service will go on without us. The office will continue. The meetings will hold. The seats we occupied will eventually be filled by someone else.

So live humbly. Show kindness while you can. Love people deeply. Do not let pride deceive you into thinking you will always be here or always be in control. At the end of life, what will matter most is not how important we seemed, but how meaningful our lives were to God and to people. One day, the service will start without every one of us. Don't be another mama Monica.

“So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.” — Psalm 90:12 (KJV)

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

12 Wraps of Eba

 

I was thinking this morning.... I walked into our restaurant for lunch recently and joined the short queue. It usually would take 3 to 5 minutes to get served, but this day it was taking longer. What's going on, I wondered as I looked at my wristwatch. I broke out of the queue and walked forward to see who was holding everyone back. What I saw shocked me. The first person in line, a lady, was virtually being served every single food item on display. I looked at her tray, looked at her, and whispered, “Jesu.” As I quietly walked back to my position on the queue, I remembered my days in Uniben.

It was my second year in the university. I was residing at Hall 2 boys’ hostel at the time, and the bukateria was not too far from the hostel. It was a hot but quiet afternoon when I walked across to have lunch. I ordered my regular two wraps of eba with a mixture of okro and egusi soups. I was yet to settle down to eat when I heard there was a competition in the next bukateria between two students on who could eat the most wraps of eba. I finished my meal and went back to my room. Less than an hour later, I stepped out to see groups of people discussing how the winner had consumed an astonishing 12 wraps of eba. He won the competition but almost lost his life because he had to be rushed to the teaching hospital for his system to be flushed. He was dying from overfeeding.

That experience, along with age, has taught me about the danger of over-indulgence. I remember again the inaugural lecture topic of a professor during my days in Uniben: “They are as sick that surfeit with too much as they that starve with nothing.” Sadly, we have too many sick people at both ends of the spectrum in Nigeria. Too many are starving, while those who have abundance are harming themselves through excess. As we say, rat wey die on top bag of rice no be hunger kill am, na overfeeding or overexcitement.

In all things, balance is key. Life is not sustained by excess but by moderation, wisdom, and gratitude. Whether in food, wealth, or opportunities, knowing when “enough is enough” is a discipline that preserves both health and purpose. May we learn to appreciate provision without abusing it, and to extend compassion to those who lack what we take for granted. “Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags.” Prov 23:20–21

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy New Month!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey

FROM BORROWED ROBES TO BORROWED LEGS

 

I was thinking this morning... Yesterday, I attended the wedding of a young woman I’ve known for over 15 years. She worked where I did, serving diligently across all levels, and she is also a devoted member of my church. She has always been known for her calm nature, consistency, and reliability. For years, I wondered why she remained unmarried. So when she finally shared the news of her wedding, I was genuinely happy for her.

Life, however, remains full of mysteries. Many good people struggle to attain simple blessings, while others who seem less deserving appear to get them with ease. Why does it happen that way?

With time, I’ve come to understand something important: some people enter marriage dressed in borrowed robes and surrounded by borrowed glamour, only to exit just as quickly. Like we used to say in Warri, they “borrow leg” and run. For many, getting married is not the challenge; staying married is.

It may be easy to attract a spouse, but do you have the character to sustain the union? There’s a pidgin saying: “Eggroll wey no get egg na puff-puff e be.” Many present themselves as “eggrolls,” but there’s no real substance inside, just appearance. In truth, they are puff-puff.

Today, we see a rising rate of marital breakdowns in Nigeria. It raises serious questions about our values and what we now consider important. While some leave marriages in the name of protecting their mental health, many unions collapse because of pride, stubbornness, and the attitude of “I no go gree.”

At the end of the day, the size of the wedding or the glamour of the celebration means very little. What truly matters is this: does the couple have substance? Is there depth, patience, humility, and love, or is it all just outward show?

Before seeking the beauty of a wedding, build the strength of a marriage. Character, not ceremony, is what sustains love. Let us focus less on appearances and more on becoming partners who are prepared, grounded, and genuine. Then and only then can we say “What God has joined together, let no one separate.” — Mark 10:9

Stay hopeful. God's got our back.

Happy Sunday!

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey