Saturday, 11 January 2020

Panty Liner Drink, Panadol Pepper Soup and the Dangers in Shortcuts

Fruit-infusionWater Bottle 

I was thinking this morning.... about the dangers and futility of shortcuts. A few weeks back, I resumed at my desk focused on clearing the pile of work as 2019 wound down. My colleague arrived soon after and set out on her routine of filling her fruit-infusion water bottle before logging into her computer. On her return from the pantry she said, 'Mr Weyimi, you won't believe what I just heard.' 'What?' I asked looking away from my computer. Looking stunned, she said 'A lady saw me filling my water bottle, stared at the bottle and asked if it was panty liner that was inside.' 'Whoa!!! Where was that from? Was that a sick joke?' I followed up in quick succession. She told me that the lady revealed that some people use panty liners in place of fruits for infused water recipe. The reason is not for flavour but as a weight loss therapy. She concluded by saying 'You have to think about this bizarre act on Sunday.' Panty liner drink? Wonders shall never end!


As I thought about it, my confusion deepened. There are established weight loss measures including dieting and exercise. And if you want to enjoy while losing weight, then you can join the keto diet program. But that someone will believe that putting panty liner in drinking water is a shortcut to losing weight is rather disgusting and sheer madness to me. Why are people so ignorant?

Yes, it is an ignoramus that will drink a panty liner-infused water because it is self-inflicted, but it is only a demon that will serve customers 'panadol pepper soup.' 'Kilon je be?' My yoruba friends will ask. I read the report of the new craze in Uyo, now also happening in many other cities, where caterers use panadol (paracetamol) to cook goat meat to tenderise it. Nephrologists have reported that this practice has led to an increase in kidney failure. I will never get over the idea of 'panadol pepper soup.' Chai!!! That someone will even imagine to add panadol to cooking goat meat because they want the preparation time from killing of the goat to serving the pepper soup to be less than 30 minutes, is satanically ingenious. A killer shortcut indeed. 

It is amazing how much time people waste, putting themselves in danger in the process, looking for magic shortcuts to success. The year is just beginning and the wise are already working towards a successful year. Many with spiritual mindset are fasting and praying while others are developing their detailed annual plan with specific details of what to do to succeed this year. But the slothful and foolish will be looking for shortcuts to becoming rich, or like they say 'dem wan hammer or blow overnight.' It is this shortcut mentality that will make a young man kill his girlfriend and together with his mum eat her heart for money ritual. 

I beg you, in this 2020, avoid shortcuts, whether it is for weight loss, preparing goat meat pepper soup or making money. Proverbs 21:5, NLT says 'Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity, but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty.'

Happy Sunday.

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey. 

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